The Nitty Grittttty of It All

OK Peeps, I have finally started doing some research on Blogging.  In fact I am reading "Blogging For Dummies', by Susannah Gardner.  If you want to check out her blog or books click here.  I realize I may have made some mistakes in blogging.  If I have offended you by not commenting on your comments I apologize, or if I talked about you and accidentally offend you I apologize for that too.  I also want you to know that I do try to not use names, some of you know who I'm talking about when I say my oldest child, my youngest boy, things of that nature.  I describe my children that way to avoid confusion more than anything.  Most people don't know who I'm talking about when I say Serena, it is clearer for them if I say my oldest daughter.  I found out that there is a code of ethics in blogging and was previously unaware of this too. The "Blogging for Dummies" Code of Ethics are listed here:

• Truth Telling and Honesty
• Admit Mistakes
• Dialogue

 There is an online discussion for ethics which you can check out by clicking here. 

Now that we have all that cleared up, I was reading my past posts to see how I've done.  My honest opinion is that I know I can do better.  My more recent posts make me look like life has been peaches and cream, I wish I could say it has been 100% of the time, in truth its been a struggle for me to maintain my cool.  I feel like Jekyll and Hyde! During the daytime I'm happy go lucky, smiley, joking with my co workers.  I'm good until all the static in the house starts.  Then I get jittery, my answers are short and curt, I can feel my blood pressure rise.  I avoid contact with my family, my husband reminds me to love up the kids.  What kind of life is this?  Is quitting smoking worth it?  When I can single out a kid, I do.  Yesterday, I was reading a book when my youngest boy wormed into my blanket.  I rolled into him and squished him, uncontrollable giggles rise from the blanket!  "Whats going on Buddy?" I ask. 
"You're squishin' me!" he squeals with delight, as he tries to wiggle free.  I yank my blanket off him and pull him into a big bear hug, which he returns enthusiastically. "I love you Mom" he tells me.  I get a tear in my eye, "I love you too Bud!"  Why can't I stay like this I wonder?  This is the mom they enjoy, not the one who bites their heads off for minute details.  It's stupid, even my Dr. is mystified by my lingering anger issues.  He believes they should be over too.  I won't take the anxiety medication, he believes the depression meds are useless since I can display happiness for a least half the day and both of us agree that nicotine replacement is a dumb idea since all the nicotine is outta my system.  I'm not sure where that leaves me other than being similar to bipolar Jekyll and Hyde.
So that's the nitty gritty, the good the bad and the ugly.  I'm a work in progress and so is my blog.  I promise to my family and to my readers that my blog and I will try to be better behaved!