How Did I Get Here?

I know, Im not the greatest of blog people, not nearly as dedicated to writing as I am to reading my favorite bloggers.  I love how connected I feel to them.  They dont know me as well.  I guess I would be called a "lurker", that is the bloggers name for people who follow blogs but dont comment.  I at least officially follow them.  :-)  I want to post daily like I used to, but to be honest, my heart isn't in it like it used to be.  Life went from having a purpose to .............   What?
 My quit smoking journey turned my marriage up side down.  We already had our problems.  What marriage doesn't.  Now we dont even live together. Sad. We try to spend time as a family to try to work things out.  The kids suffer.  We suffer.  I can see my faults, I can see his.  I can see "A" solution, not necessarily "The" solution.   Be nice.  Is that so hard?  One wouldn't think so, but I see it is more difficult than it should be.  Why is it so hard to move on?  I can see us together, happy in the future.  I would love that.  But I see it may be a far fetched one.  
Being nice, is my daily goal, even when others are not nice to me.  Be me.  My advice to you, love your spouse, even when they are unlovable.  Until the next time, may God watch over you, and bless you.
Take care of your family.  Each and every one is precious.